Stress is the worst counselor and the biggest cause of cardiovascular disease and other discomforts. Yet many people suffer from it, and around me especially the smaller entrepreneurs who are struggling at the moment. But even if your business or job does go well, you can experience a lot of stress.
My dishwasher broke down the other day and just the thought of washing dishes by hand every day stressed me out. The result was halfway through the week a whole pile of dirty plates, glasses, cups, and cutlery and an angry girlfriend because the dishes are my job in the household. So even more stress.
Often it is not at all due to the workload or the work itself, but to how you schedule it. In other words, time management to avoid stress.
Do what stresses you out at agreed times
Someone I mentor has a large, exclusive beauty clinic. She loves the work and most clients, but everything around it stresses her out. Clients rescheduling appointments, wanting discounts because the treatment was not up to expectations, administration, staff spontaneously calling in sick, and so on. It gives her stress throughout the day and also makes her communicate with everyone from morning to night.
This means that, except during her sleep, she faces negative stimuli all day long, and doing so for too long in a row can cause serious mental and even physical symptoms. In her case, she becomes very short-tempered and needs a lot of rest and little energy for a social life. These are signs that incipient burnout may be coming.
Now, of course, she cannot make a client who wants to reschedule an appointment wait a day. But about 80 percent of the responses she gives to clients or employees can wait. The advantage if you do all those things at a time is that you will then have mostly positive impulses the rest of the time.
In fact, the problem is that negative impulses discharge you and positive impulses charge you. But just as a positive impulse makes you resistant to a negative impulse, a negative impulse makes the positive impulse less powerful or not received at all.
Doing the thing that stresses you out within a certain time frame gives your body and mind time to recover and recharge, and you will also do the things that need to be done more efficiently.
Reframe the meaning you give to negative things
Those dishes I have to do for a while, it's only a 2-person wash, of course, doesn't represent anything. It is only the image I have of it and thus the meaning I give to it. For instance, I find it an interruption of my time that I want to spend together after dinner, the water is always too cold or too hot, I never get the glasses properly dried, and I am a mess pilot, so a glass always falls into the water in shards. Just try to get that out without cuts!
If I reframe this to how nice my girlfriend, who does most of the housework, thinks it is that I also do my bit, doing the dishes is a lot less of a problem. In addition, if I give it the meaning that I can also catch up with my friend while doing the dishes, and that it takes less than 10 minutes and then the kitchen is all tidy again because I can also clean the rest with the suds, then doing the dishes is almost a party.
In the same way, it can work with the things that annoy the lady who runs the exclusive beauty clinic. That customer who wants to reschedule can provide excellent service, and that customer who was not satisfied at first, when is satisfied again, can provide huge word-of-mouth advertising. So she is actually working on her brand. The employees are her greatest asset and she can bond with them even more through a little time and attention, thus ensuring her continuity.
Every medal has two sides
Actually, we do know: everything that is fun also has a downside. Besides time management and reframing, it is therefore also important to accept. After all, we cannot just enjoy the joys and ignore the burdens. Having a child is great, but the poopy nappy has to be changed too, right?
But accepting is different from tolerating. It is stronger, and true acceptance reduces the stress you experience while doing the activity. It's like being in a traffic jam: you know it's like that, you can't change it, and getting angry about it will only make it annoy you even more. Take a deep breath, undergo it. Sing a song to it, for all I care, but accept it.
The power of acceptance lies in the ability to accommodate negative experiences without them permanently affecting our well-being. By embracing both the good and the not-so-good sides of situations, we can live a more balanced and stress-free life. Acceptance also helps us to be more realistic in our expectations and find more satisfaction in the here and now. It is an essential part of personal growth and resilience.
Q&A
What is stress anyway?
Stress is a reaction of the body to challenges or threats. It is a natural alarm mechanism that helps you cope with difficult situations, but too much stress can be detrimental to your health.
Why do we perceive stress as negative?
Although stress is a natural and sometimes useful response, we often experience it as negative because it can exhaust us physically and mentally. Prolonged stress can lead to health problems such as cardiovascular disease, anxiety disorders, and depression.
How can time management help reduce stress?
Answer: Managing your time effectively helps you avoid overwhelm, prioritize, and achieve realistic goals. This reduces the pressure and feeling of not having enough time, which can be a major source of stress.
What does it mean to reframe the meaning of negative experiences?
Reframing means giving a different interpretation or perspective to a situation. By changing the meaning of negative experiences, you can see them in a more positive light and reduce their emotional impact.
How can acceptance contribute to stress reduction?
Acceptance means acknowledging that some situations are beyond your control and stopping fighting against reality. This can help reduce the inner struggle and therefore stress.
Can you eliminate stress completely from your life?
It is unrealistic to expect to eliminate all stress because some stressors are beyond your control and stress is also a part of life. The goal is to manage stress better, not to avoid it completely.
